All Hail The Commander in Chief ! President Donald J. Trump

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Well… that really fucking sucked ass and swallowed.

Did you see the inauguration of Donald John Trump?

What the fuck was that?

I must admit I had never really seen a full Presidential Inauguration before. I’d seen snippets and it looked like a lot of protocol and a ball of some sort and huge crowds and music, like a Hollywood gala of sorts. I normally don’t watch TV… but.. w o w… That was something else. A Presidential Inauguration is indeed “protocol” which means militairy and marching and flags and then the important people gather on a balcony and speak out over the crowds of regular folk gathered below.

It has a distinct Roman element to it.

It also has a crazy religious component to it.

The new President goes to church. During the actual inauguration we got four (4) religious figures giving speeches and it was crazy zealotry fuming stuff from the good book.

Bible Icon

And then we get President Donald J. Trump.

Make sure you’re sitting down with an alcoholic beverage within reach when you view this.

I’ve not had the chance to use the word demagogue in any post yet.

Thanks Donald.

Giving “power” back to “you, the people”, is particularly vulgar propaganda.

His “cabinet” is filthy rich.

They’re worth some nine and a half billion dollars.

9,500,000,000 $

They “own” more than the poorest 43 million households in the US.

That’s households, not people. So times 2 or 3, you end up with:

86,000,000 people

or

129,000,000 people

The carnage stops now.

Rorschach Blotch

Yay.

Another crazy person in the White house.

America First. America First.

Sure Whatever

I will never, ever let you down.

You kinda have been letting me down for decades, man?
In fact... you're doing it right now.
You're a douche.

We will eradicate radical Islamic terrorism from the face of the earth.

Knights Templar

(… swiftly followed by annihalating the pedophile infested Catholic Church?)

(Or should that be “invested” eds.)

Eradicate. From the face of the earth.

He really said that.

Nod Yes Icon

It’s nice to have such ehm… realistic ehm policies that we can apply ehm… metrics to.

We’d have to like… scan the ehm… face of the earth.

And then we’d ehm measure Radical Islamic Terror.

And as long as that doen’t come up zero (0), we… ehm… do stuff.

At the same time we should also measure Radical Islamic Terror in outer space.

You know ehm “off” or “away” from the face of the earth, as a ehm… validating metric.

As long as that number increases, this ehm… policy is effective.

Concussion

And most importantly….

We. Will. Be. Protected. By. God.

God At Work Sign

The time for empty talk is over.

Then why doesn't this speech end, dickhead?

We will never be ignored again.

No Signal Logo

I am calling it.

Park Avenue Hitler.

We then get a “ball” where the new First Family dances the night away.

He then gets a microphone into his hands and goes…

My enemies don’t want me to use Twitter.

What do you think I should do?

Needless to say, the crowd goes wild and ehm… petitions Donald Trump to… by all means, continue with Twitter…

I mean, it’s a free country (or it used to be, kind of… )

You can Tweet the nuclear launch codes for all we care.

Donald Trump Einstein Twitter

Okay … now stay with me…

What’s the very first thing this cocksucker did?

He removed all references to climate change from the White House website.

Because 1 + 1 could be 3, y’know?

And everybody knows that when you remove words from one (1) single website?

Then scientific reality magically changes. And our climate is healed.

A Presidentential Committee will oversee the removal of the word "cancer" from any and all medical texts to swiftly eradicate this horrendous disease which has plagued humanity for generations.

Shaking No Emoticon

And then the day after the Inauguration and the ball?

He went to an after-prayer service that was broadcast live…

…for fucking hours…

…on cnn…

CNN Arabic Logo

…all over the world.

Nod Yes Icon

(Which has to be the worst fucking after-party evah).

President Donald J. Trump is absolutely crazy..

.. and stupid.

The people around him are also crazy and stupid.

That’s a bad mix, people.

He is going to cause a tremendous amount of damage.

Fall Out Shelter

I am going to be wearing a helmet all of the timeincluding indoors.

Darth Vader Helmet

Gas Mask

Donald Trump Fear Poster

I’ll review his “cabinet” once they’re all approved and sworn in.

I advise you to acquire a helmet for yourself (and loved ones) before you read that review.

 

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